who it is. I dont like what i see, but its a sad reality of what this will do to a person.
I use to be in great shape, not long ago. Just over a year ago, i would walk through the living room,
grab one of the kids in each arm and pick them up and carry them around the house without thinking twice.
Now mind you, Jordi was around 50 pounds then, and alec was close to 100 pounds.
I was pushing 190, all muscle, very little fat, my arms were decent sized, so was my chest...
Now days i get out of the shower and look in the mirror and wonder who the heck that is. I weighed myself tonight. I have lost weight since i went to the doc's last, so that means i am going to have to put the 10 pounds of muscle on that he wanted plus what i lost. I am down to 146lbs. Sad.. I cant say i like what i see
but i dont have a lot of option. My body is doing what it wants.
I think for me, this is the worst part of the disease. I was always in decent shape, my last job before driving truck was very physical and demanding, and i liked it, i got paid to work out. Sure office jobs are nice, but they dont keep you fit and in shape. I did it for over 5 years, but i did notice towards the end of the job i was getting slower and weaker, but had no clue as to why. I chalked it up to age. Surprise.. not age. :(
Now days, i do good to do simple things around the house. Which is saddening to me.
It is something i am going to have to learn to deal with.
Ok, thats it for now, i'm up not sleeping again.. im so tired its not even funny, but hurt to much to pass out..
hopefully i can in a little bit.
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